And all the roads we have to walk are winding, and all the lights that lead us there are blinding.

We had it so good.

It was the most awesome first date. Watching turtles at the arboretum. Sunset over the lake. Walking, just walking. Eating popsicles. The hissing from the bushes - I leapt back, actually lept, and he swept me behind him, protecting me from... the sprinklers. But it COULD have been a rabid animal! We went back to my shuttle, I made popcorn and watched Zim. We must have played three movies, and just talked through all of them. He put his arm around me. "Are you gonna kiss me?" And he did.

Tom's going away party, with all his friends. Double rainbow in the car, all four of us. Sitting on his lap singing Journey. Beer pong in the basement and I broke a couple bottles. "It's okay, I'm just drunk! I'm just drunk!" Dancing - "For drunk and clumsy you're really pretty good!" Happy Meals and Zim and falling asleep on the couch.

Animonday - anime and plum wine, holding hands on the couch.

Who could say no to all that? He's hurting. We're ALL hurting, aren't we? Joy is the cure for pain. Not quarantine.

Tomorrow I'll be 2000 miles away, having the time of my life with some of my favorite people. But suddenly that matters not half as much as knowing he said we could do dinner on his birthday next week.

Teach me how to NOT go all in, for once.